ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone.
Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do Not Answer".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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