ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.
The printer has better job security.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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