ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 11 APRIL 2025
Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone.
Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do Not Answer".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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