ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 10 APRIL 2025
You're "in your villain era".
You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times. Villains have done less damage at a christening.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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