ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You left them on read "to be mysterious".
They didn't notice. They were also being mysterious. You're now two mysteries who will never speak again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Underconsumption core is a beautiful aesthetic. It's what the last week of the month…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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