ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You got the ick because they ran for a bus.
You've been single three years and you run for nothing. Including opportunities.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- Move fast and break things. You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your…
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- The game asks if you want to continue. Nobody ever asks if you want…
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
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