ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious.
Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it to Tuesday.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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