ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 14 JULY 1969
You quit your job to "find yourself".
Found you. You're on your parents' sofa, and the Wi-Fi password has been changed.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- Move fast and break things. You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your…
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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