ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise.
One of you will die first. It'll still be pending.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- You rage quit because the game was rigged. You were also just bad. Both…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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