ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You don't have a type.
You have a pattern. Your friends have a group chat about it. You're not in it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- You can't take money with you when you go. Your direct debits, however, will…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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