ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once.
They'll merge. You'll be the one let go.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- Your squad misses you, says the notification. Your squad is four strangers and a…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- In three generations, nobody will remember your name. You don't know your great-grandmother's, so…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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