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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION MONDAY, 5 JANUARY 1976
You said "that's so me" about a horoscope.
It also described 600 million other people and a goldfish.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
  2. Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
  3. Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
  4. The council listened to your feedback. Then it did the thing anyway, but with…
  5. You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
  6. Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
  7. You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 446

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