ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January.
It's been screaming quietly ever since.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Your startup is an app that replaces a phone call. With a waitlist, a…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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