ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something.
It landed. Enjoy that. It's the last thing this week that will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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