ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- You call it "quiet quitting". Your manager calls it "the same as before". Nobody…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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