ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month.
The call took 94 minutes. You break even in 2031. They put it back up in 2027.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- You call it "quiet quitting". Your manager calls it "the same as before". Nobody…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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