ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You don't skip leg day.
You skip every day. The legs know. The legs are keeping a list.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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