ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people.
All of them are "just seeing where it goes". It goes nowhere. It went nowhere with you twice.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- You don't have a type. You have a pattern. Your friends have a group…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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