ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You don't have a type.
You have a pattern. Your friends have a group chat about it. You're not in it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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