ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 12 AUGUST 1987
He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped to the bar.
You replied in four minutes. That's the part he was counting on.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every great company started in a garage. Yours will end there too. The car's…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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