ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You left them on read "to be mysterious".
They didn't notice. They were also being mysterious. You're now two mysteries who will never speak again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- Your startup is an app that replaces a phone call. With a waitlist, a…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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