ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your company will send flowers to your funeral.
They'll be charged to your department's budget.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You call it "quiet quitting". Your manager calls it "the same as before". Nobody…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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