ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair.
You sit on it like a frog. The chair has given up on you too.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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