ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 5 JANUARY 1991
Coffee doesn't fix Monday.
It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair. You sit on it like a frog.…
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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