ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You left them on read "to be mysterious".
They didn't notice. They were also being mysterious. You're now two mysteries who will never speak again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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