ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 2 AUGUST 2000
You're "on a gap year".
It's your third.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- Unlimited holiday is a lovely policy. The company did the maths on your guilt,…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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