ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 25 DECEMBER 2007
Age is just a number.
So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than your salary.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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