ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 4 OCTOBER 2012
You are a valued member of the team.
So was the last person in your chair. Nobody knows where she went.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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