ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle.
The kettle will outlast the excitement. Possibly you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right. Investors loved it. The…
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
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