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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION SATURDAY, 4 MARCH 2017
Mondays aren't so bad.
They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
  2. You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
  3. Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
  4. You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
  5. Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
  6. Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
  7. When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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