ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You got the ick because they ran for a bus.
You've been single three years and you run for nothing. Including opportunities.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
- You put "open to work" on LinkedIn. Six recruiters viewed your profile. Five were…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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