ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 21 SEPTEMBER 2019
He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped to the bar.
You replied in four minutes. That's the part he was counting on.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- “Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Your fitness journey started on the second of January. It ended on the fourth.…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- You film "Sunday reset" videos. By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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