ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands.
It will be the most productive minute of the quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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