ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "so random".
You've told the same "so random" story at every party since 2022.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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