ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your resting heart rate is excellent.
It's had nothing else to do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- “Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English…
- The game asks if you want to continue. Nobody ever asks if you want…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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