ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're not getting older.
You're getting closer. That's worse.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- Both sides declared victory. The only clear loser was your Tuesday evening.
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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