ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Running clears your head.
Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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