ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 5 NOVEMBER 1972
You hyped your mate's mixtape.
You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including your mate.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- There's no I in team. There are two in "invoice still unpaid". And one…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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