ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You got the ick because they ran for a bus.
You've been single three years and you run for nothing. Including opportunities.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.