ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English language.
Then they renamed it. The sentence survived.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Make your money work for you. Yours quit in 2019. It works for your…
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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