ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Think outside the box.
The box had the budget. You're out here with a sticky note.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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