ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're not getting older.
You're getting closer. That's worse.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Some meetings could have been an email. You'll spend four years of your one…
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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