ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 18 JANUARY 2000
The weekend is two days long.
Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're paid for one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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