ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You received 40 fundraising texts today.
Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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