ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands.
It will be the most productive minute of the quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.…
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- Life is short. A measurable chunk of it will be spent in the post…
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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