ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years.
You're the phase they'll describe to a therapist.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Mistakes were made. Nobody made them. They just happened, like weather.
- You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair. You sit on it like a frog.…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- In three generations, nobody will remember your name. You don't know your great-grandmother's, so…
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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