ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 8 MARCH 1973
You'll never get on the property ladder.
The only plot you'll ever own is two metres deep, and there's a waiting list.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- Move fast and break things. You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your…
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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