ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 29 SEPTEMBER 1993
Your thirties are your twenties with consequences.
The hangover lasts until Wednesday and reports straight to your liver.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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