ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- The in-office lunch is optional. The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.