ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 16 DECEMBER 2002
They're taking time away from social media.
You know because they posted about it eleven times.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The in-office lunch is optional. The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- Parenting is ten percent love and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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